On being the new girl

Our middle school has a day each year (fondly known as stalk-a-student day) where parents come along and follow their children through their classes. Even though it's scheduled on a shorter day with shortened classes, I am always SO EXHAUSTED at the end of the day, drained by all the newness, the trodding from place to place, the sitting still and listening over and over.

Every year it made me a little more charitable towards my drooping, tired teenagers who would come through the door at the end of the day. Suddenly I better understood the need for snacking (not that I ever needed to stretch to understand that, mind you), the pull of the sofa (ditto), the need to put their feet up for a few minutes before launching into the afternoon.

I had the same, exhausted feeling all last week. I think I experienced some kind of jet lag job lag with adjusting to the new schedule, filling my brain chock full of new information, talking to grownups, being "on" for a whole slew of hours in a row, and getting up earlier & hitting the ground running.

Sunrise, Boston

Now that the job lag has mostly subsided I can wrap my brain around some of my impressions of highlights, challenges, and essentials for this new venture.

Highlights:

1. Having a name badge that I swipe to get in and out of a restricted door between the museum and the elevators to my office. It just feels so clandestine and official at the same time.
2. Wearing work clothes. Still feels like dress up but maybe the novelty will wear off eventually.
3. The luxury of focusing without distraction for a few hours.
4. The flexibility of my workplace. I work 7-3 and it could not be more perfect (well...8 to 2 would be awesome, too). Also? Most of my department works from home at least one day a week; after a few months there I'll be eligible to do that, too.
5. The location on the wharf with a lovely view of Boston and the harbor. Have you been to Boston? My office is above the Children's Museum, the building next to the the giant Hood milk bottle on the dock, and near the site of the Boston Tea Party. The views make me happy every time.
6. Having work mates. Although I've only admitted it to a few people, I have been just plain lonely for the last while and this is a nice remedy. (By the way, one colleague is planning on going on 180 dates in 2012. She's got some good stories.
7. Two words: Office supplies.
8. The job itself feels like such a great fit and, at the same time, it stretches me. It's gratifying and invigorating.

Challenges:

1. The obvious: Getting everything done at home that I used to do. It took me about 4 days to finish all the laundry last week, where I used to be a Monday-is-laundry-day, start to finish, kind of gal.
2. Leaving the house at 6:15 a.m. Yawn. One day at a time on this one.
3. Negotiating my flex hours. I was nervous to ask but I'm so glad I did. Note to self: you don't know if you don't ask.
4. I miss margins. I kind of like long transitions between things and prefer big margins to my day. Those are gone. It's a tradeoff.
5. Will I ever make it to the post office again? (Sorry, Lauren, your package is coming SOON.)
6. Being the new girl is exhilarating and also humbling. It's a challenge to start from scratch on everything: where the light switch is, how to do everything, what the office culture does and doesn't do, and all the details about the organization and my particular job. It hurts me brain sometimes.

Couldn't do it without:

1. G. taking over the morning send-off responsibility. I miss those morning minutes with Maddy and Sam but I'm thrilled for him that he gets to have that time with them. I'm so grateful for him and his boundless, enthusiastic support. Plus he has a cold this week. Extra bonus points for G.
2. Calling, texting, leaving notes, adding new routines and rituals to our day (my every-morning note to Sam, for example).
3. Amazon and the occasional grocery home delivery. Some things had to go and I have pretty much abdicated my errand running in favor of online purchasing. Again, it's a trade off.
4. Protecting my time at home. All I want to do when I get home is hang out with my people. I'm both an adventurer and a homebody (trivia: did you know this blog was first named "Ambitious Homebody"? It's true.) and I need my home time. Work will be plenty adventure for me for now.
5. Ah, at the risk of repeating: That flexible schedule. I'm so grateful to preserve my afternoons at home and to feel like there's still a good part of the day left when I get home.
6. Supportive, lovely friends (both near and far) who talked me down and built me up on more than one occasion.

Speaking of lovely and supportive, thanks for your kind, generous comments and emails and texts. They meant more to me than you know.

Elevenses

11.11.11 at 11:11

I think I established my date/number geekinees a few years ago.  Suffice it to say my number geekiness and love of symmetry is having a field day today (and it looks like I'm not the only one). Thank goodness I have some good sports here who are willing to humor me.  I think they're just counting their lucky stars that I don't get out my blue paint and paintbrush.

In honor of this most auspicious (and random) of days, I give you a list of 11 (auspicious, random, terrific) things I've starred in my reader lately because I loved them. Maybe you will, too:

1.   Conversation starters for married people's date night (The Chattering Crow)
2.   A murmuration of starlings (amazing video via Design Mom)
3.   Dad turns seventy (great, easy idea for honoring someone's milestone birthday via Inchmark)
4.   What you do every day matters more than what you do once in a while (Happiness Project)
5.   Do you worry too much? (A Cup of Jo)
6.   Babies in the air (Flickr blog)
7.   We have a strategic plan (Swissmiss)
8.   Creating a stuffed animal from your child's drawing (Stephmodo)
9.   Maple Bars (Our Best Bites)
10. Every Little Speck (About a Girl)
11. Motherhood Bipolar Disorder (My Angle of Repose)

 

Miss Maddy is turning 16 on Sunday so we'll be celebrating her wonderful Maddyness this weekend.

I hope you have a lovely, random, + auspicious weekend

Snippets

"No heaven can come to us unless our hearts find rest in it today" ~ Fra Giovanni

1. I'm going camping in New Hampshire tonight with the family.  G and Sam planned all of the dutch oven meals, shopped for the supplies, and packed us all up. Apparently all I have to do is pack my sweatshirt, pajamas, pillow, and toothbrush. Heaven.

2. This morning I sat in the September sun on a bench with a good friend. We talked for two hours and felt the breeze and twinges of autumn. It was so restorative and helped me remember to look upward and outward more. Heaven.

3. I'm giddy with anticipation for a girls' adventure starting Monday. Christie and I are heading out on a long-planned, much-postponed and eagerly anticipated journey to London and Paris for eight lucky days.* (Believe me, I know how lucky I am. Europe? In October? With Christie? For a whole week? Heaven.) My happy dance looks like this:

Note: I don't know about the song's hypothesis about the relationship between wifely ugliness and any subsequent husbandly happiness that springs from it. I just like the dancing, not the message. But, oh, what dancing!

4. What I do know, however, is that I married a terrific man who really is willing to find ways to build bits of heaven for us here on earth. He continues to amaze me with his kindness and support. He not only tolerates my pursuits and wanderings he nudges me to do them, knowing me as he does. Here's to G. Heaven to me.

. . .

*please let me know what your Londan and Paris faves are. I admit I've been to London a few times but I've still got a lot to see and learn about that city. And I've only been to Paris once, when I was 18. What to see/eat/walk/experience?

Randomness does not skip a generation

I came across a little pile of 14 cards under a stack of books on the ottoman. Apparently Sam compiled these at some point this summer before he left, just because. It was a delicious little dose of his sense of humor and randomness:

(we really do call his barber Tim the Shrubber. Just a little Monty Python reference, you know.)

The other lists are equally charming and quirky. Oh, we miss that boy...

. . .

In that same spirit (and since I do love a good list as much as the next gal) I'll add a few random things of my own:

Summer loves:

• Crates full of CSA veg (mint! corn! cucumbers! potatoes! zucchini! loads of greens!)
• Loads of salads (see above)
• Streaming shows and movies on Amazon prime for FREE (Hasta la vista, Netflix?)
• Dog walks (Louie got skunked so now we walk rather than send him out in back to meet Mrs. Skunk and her five babies again)
• Spotify Joinjoinjoin. It's like Pandora but you can listen to whatever you want + create playlists
• Smores bars. I made these for my sunday school class. Oh, Minerva. They are goooood.
• Air conditioning.
• Long evenings. 

Still dreaming to do this summer:

• see the new Harry Potter movie (waiting for Sam to see it with me)
• Refresh my French (it's in there somewhere...)
• Revive calligraphying
• Decide on room reassignments and decorating 
• Drive-in movie 
• A little getaway with G
• Have an outdoors dinner party

Good reads I'm still thinking about:

• My blogland friend's (although she doesn't know me at all...I just read her blog and imagine we're friends, you know?) young daughter survived a shark attack. Amazing tale.
• Russell Brand's commentary on Amy Winehouse's death  was insightful
• Kristen Duke's hints on how to pose in photos: much appreciated
• Anne's commentary on text vs. in person relationships; this is something L and I have talked about a lot, too.

Liner notes 16-20

16. Enthusiasm is cooler than cool is. Go all in.

17. Righty tighty. Lefty loosey.

18. Value experiences over things. You've heard this; it's one of our family's informal mottos. If you have the chance to see the world through someone else's eyes, to enrich and expand and even challenge what you already know, take it. It's one of the important things we're here to do.

19. A little mystery is a good thing. Shut the bathroom door, for instance.

20. If you see someone you know, go say hi.

. . . 

With the first of my children leaving home in the next few months, I'm writing occasional (weeklyish) Liner Notes, bits of advice to my kids concerning my take on how to be a gracious, awesome grown-up-type person (both trivial bits and major advice). Why "liner notes"? Because, back in the day, I pored over the liner notes of my cds, curious to find the story behind the music. That's what I hope this will be: the story behind the music of growing up and setting off on your own. (Or at least a ready-made catalog of how you can avoid making my mistakes.) Feel free to chime in! What would you add?

. . .

photo of Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong by Phil Stern, 1952

Five Fives

Five songs I most recently downloaded:

1. Jerusalem, Choir of Westminster Abbey (because I watched the wedding + remembered how much I love that hymn)
2. You Were Never There, Diego Garcia (not sure where I heard it)
3. If You Don't Wanna Love Me, James Morrison (because it was on So You Think You Can Dance and I shazamed it)
4. Gravity, Sara Bareilles (because Maddy loves it)
5. Our Eyes, Teddy Geiger (because Lauren loves it; just ignore the cheesy video)

Five things we're having for dinner this week (can you tell that my meal motto is "easy peasy"?): 

1. homemade pizzas, cooked on the grill, cantaloupe
2. grilled chicken, spinach salad, orzo & shrimp salad
3. sandwich bar & potato salad, fresh fruit
4. pasta (red sauce and alfredo), fresh bread, green salad
5. rotisserie chicken tacos, watermelon 

Five things on my To Do list today:

1. laundry
2. plan meals
3. buy wedding gifts
4. grocery store
5. make reservations for L's family graduation dinner

Five things not on my To Do list that I've done anyway: 

1. spend browsy time online 
2. watch Larkrise to Candleford season 1 dvd while I fold laundry (and then some)
3. have a good, deep heart-to-heart with one of my kids (best thing all day)
4. worry a little for one of my kids who is sad
5. update my ipod and look for new apps (please tell me your favorites) 

Five things I'm looking forward to: 

1. Dinner with this lovely person tonight
2. My parents' arrival this week
3. Lauren's graduation in a week and a bit
4. Seeing this with my sister in June
5. Summer plans (although the kids don't get out until June 27th. I know, right?!)

How about you? Do share...

. . .

Image via Number of the Day

List of five: How we roll today

1. It snowed. Happy April Fools Day, New England style!

2. Unfortunately, this car is not how we roll today.

Lauren and Maddy got into a fender bender last night, where they were the middle of a three-car cruncher. Luckily, everyone was okay other than being a little shaken. (They complained of some achiness this morning so we asked the doctor to check out Maddy's headache and neck ache and Lauren's back ache. All is well.) But still scary.  Someone please come up with a bubble wrap enclosure for our teenagers. Okay, thanks.

3. G had to do a video teleconference from home this morning so we got him all set up.

The tower of board games to position the light was particularly delightful. Oh, yeah. That's how we roll.

4. School is hard work. Naps are how we roll on Friday afternoons.

Changing the world, one nap at a time.

5. Thank you for your paint suggestions! They definitely led me in the right direction and now I have a very nice reference folder for future projects. I settled on Moonshine for our bedroom, a soothing grey. This was my Moonshine inspiration, at Young House Love , where someone sent me but I can't remember who:

So far I love it. The faded wallpaper and quirky tree mural from the previous owner are gone, baby, gone! Um, yes, it took me three years from that wallpaper post to get to the bedroom paint makeover. And, yes, I STILL decided the paint color at the last minute. I'm coming to realize (and G has long known) that's just how I roll.

Happy weekend, one and all! I will be enjoying General Conference, attending a dear friend's daughter's bat mitvah, doing prom errands with Lauren, and cozying up for some family time.

Seeds.

Ha. If only!

Seeds of inspiration*

1. This motivating (for me anyway) talk by photog Andrew Zuckerman about the creative process
2. Episodes of new t.v. show Fairly Legal (just pure fun...those are good seeds, too)
3. An inspiring TED talk by mother-daughter Somali doctors
4. Bohemian Rhapsody on the ukelele (This reminds me that we had a discussion about the beginning words of that song. The kids thought it said "Mama just killed a man" and I was pretty sure that it was someone talking to Mama: "Mama, just killed a man." We googled and I was right. What a difference a comma makes!)
5. Nigel Marsh's words about work-life balance

 Seeds of hope**

1. I'm so moved by the scenes in Egypt today. Amazing. I hope things go smoothly for them.
2. That reminds me. Have you read Persepolis? It's a graphic (comic-strip) memoir (and also a movie) about a young girl in Iran during the revolution in 1979-80. My students are assigned to read one of five books to apply social and emotional development principles to the character. This is one of them.
3. Another of the choices is The Glass Castle, which I also just finished. What a grueling, heartbreaking, funny story of hope and resilience. Have you read it? (I think I'm the last person around to read it.)

Seeds of love***

1. This profile of the Neon Tree's {female} drummer rocks.
2. Stacy Julian has the BEST idea for a Minute to Win It valentine. We're doing these for sure.
3. You will melt over the sweetest batch of valentines ever, via Brooke at inchmark.
4. Loved Michelle's chronicle of their Valentine making night, too.
5. The Tale of Two Parkers (on Segullah today) will probably move you to tears. Just warning.
6. Sarah, you'll never be a bad mother but your post made me laugh. I've totally been there. 

. . .

*Lately I have been trying to exercise an hour a day. The snow and ice are conspiring against me so I have taken to watching or listening to something while I glide away on the elliptical. Mind happy, body happy. Here's what I've watched/listened to lately.

 **I've been thinking a lot about hope and looking for examples around me.

***Spreading seeds of blog love. These are some ideas and posts I starred this week.

Making grey lemonade

Print by John Kenn

Yesterday's cozy has become today's dreary. Not only is it rainy and blah, I'm mourning a bit over a trip-that-didn't-happen to the big city this weekend. I think this calls for a list.

Things to do on a dreary day like today:

Take a nap at 10 a.m.

Pick up fresh flowers at Trader Joe's

Read

Turn on all the lamps in the house

Start the weekend early with a movie marathon

Laugh at old yearbooks

Smile at Maddy's birthday Amazon wishlist

Bake + sing + tapdance in the kitchen

Wear red shoes

Go get a McDonald's diet coke (crushed ice, big straw)

Think about Thanksgiving plans

Order fun stamps from USPS

Order prints of lots of computer-trapped photos

Read Lauren's letters of recommendation for college apps

Decide everyone should get affirming letters of recommendation now and then

Take deep deep breaths

imagine I'm here^

Or all of the above.

In a nutshell

(the one where I catch up with June)

1. Maddy was invited to the Taylor Swift/Justin Bieber concert (the last one on the tour) but then the mom couldn't go. So I took Maddy and friend. Oh, the decibels! But it was great fun.

(They wore fabulous red lipstick for the occasion, of course.)

2. We've been in sports watching frenzy mode all month long. Celtics (sob), World Cup games (I hear buzzing just thinking about it), Wimbledon (oh that cute Isner playing one set for 3 days). 

3. I hung some pictures in our house! It only took 3 years of indecision. And, even so, there will be changes, I'm sure. 

4. Maddy graduated from middle school (more to come on that) and attended the traditional 8th grade semi-formal. I'm impressed by what a good sport she is about finding a dress that is her spunky style and modest at the same time. 

 5. I have learned, again and again, how important exercise is for my mood/energy/life/brain. I am starting to consider it a daily vitamin.  Still loving my 4-mile loop. And, some mornings, playing tennis with Greg, Maddy, or Sam. 

6. I saw Toy Story 3 with Sam the day it opened. We cried. (See it!) 

7. Sam left on his very first scout camp this week. He's excited to sleep in a hammock every night, pass off his environmental science and swimming merit badges, and shower only when he wants to. We miss him but have been taking advantage of the girls-only days, I assure you.

15 minutes after this photo he got a haircut, by the way

8. Where's L this month? Good question! Sometimes we wonder that, too. Studying and taking finals (oh, those junior year pressures). Social life galore. Learning the guitar with her friend A. Scheming to fix up the attic in her room with paint and electricity (the previous owners dropped the ceiling and put in a drop down ladder, making her own private storage space). Getting ready for her next big adventure this summer, leaving in two days for...Tonga!  More about that soon. 

9. We were gifted with a visit from our dear friends of yore, the H family (aka the Sties) this weekend.  We were all thrilled to bask in their awesomeness for not one, not two, but three days (Maddy said "sometimes it feels like they're not just our friends, they're our cousins." True. Also, wishful thinking!)  Alas, I didn't take pictures so I'll have to wait until I can swipe some of theirs.  But it was good to get my Christie fix. I miss her. (And she left me with an awesome hostess gift, a vintage globe from a local antique shop that I have had my eye on for ages.  Seriously, she is that fantastic.)

10. We are off to Eclipse tonight. In a moment of weakness (despite knowing I am WAY too old to stay up that late) I agreed to take a car full of teens to the midnight show. I'd better go take a nap.